Fuck you if you disagree

Awesome things about DUI's and why you should consider driving drunk to get one.

2010-01-29T14:15:00.001-07:00

You don't have to worry about driving anywhere anymore.
Therefore you can drink as much as you want.
You've been to jail, you have jail stories.
As soon as someone finds out you've been to jail, you can tell these stories and make their day.
If no one is polite enough to ask you about your time in jail, you can always interject one into a conversation by saying 'Well when I was in jail....' and just apply it to the subject matter at hand, you can always make it fit.
If people aren't paying you the proper attention you demand you can start quietly sobbing or screaming about something and just claim that something triggered a flashback of your time in jail, and then proceed to tell a story about jail, whether or not it has something to do with the 'flashback'.
As the disturbance level of the flashback goes up so does the chance that someone will you buy a drink*.
Feel free to embellish, the people want fantasy not stories about the fat chick staring at you from the toilet across the aisle.
It is possible there is someone there who just recently got a DUI and might be scared of whats to come, frighten them with your worst stories and act as their mentor.
More thoughts on this subject matter to come.

*theory only, not been tested.

I've got a bad feeling about this...

2009-11-30T00:22:00.000-07:00

Suzy just got a webcam and so we'll probably never leave our computers. I made cinnamon sugar apple donut holes tonight, they were delicious. I guess I'm gonna make cannolis this week. Mmmm. What else? I dunno.

Do want

2009-11-19T01:03:00.002-07:00

this.

The fuckery just never ends

2009-11-17T18:41:00.000-07:00

So I'm gonna scan a prison journal as soon as I get it all written out (writing on paper is hard ya'll) but it will be coming so brace yourselves for that. I can't believe how tired I am, I slept soooooooooooo well last night and then fell asleep for a little nap this afternoon. There's no food in this house which is so aggravating. Yawn, that's all for now.

Fuck these people

2009-11-12T17:55:00.000-07:00

OH MY GOD CHOCOLATE COVERED BACON??? THAT'S AKIN TO DEVIL WORSHIPPIN'!! AND DEEP FRIED SWEETS! HOLY CRAP SOMEONE CALL JESUS FOR THE SECOND COMING TO STOP THIS DEBAUCHERY

Fuck that lady and the people who made those horrendous comments. If you don't like it don't go to these events.

ps

I don't actually know any of these peoples' religions but their comments are so close-minded and hateful they seem like they sit at home all day watching PAX.

Woman of Science.

2009-11-08T21:27:00.000-07:00

So I'm doing some highly academic internet research and on why lately 80% of what I consume lately is Cheez-Its and eggnog. I'm also trying to find out how quickly this will kill me. I don't think the eggnog is so bad since it contains milk and that means I might finally be getting a decent amount of calcium. Some might say all the sugar cancels out any health benefits I might be getting from it. But then I would smack them in the face with some truth, on a typical day I consume about 5 glasses of water and....4-8 glasses of soda. Let's say two of those servings of soda are with food and so those stay the same but for the past week I've replaced the other 2-6 servings with eggnog. So I was already drinking something incredibly high in sugar and I've replaced with something high in sugar but with calcium. I don't want to hear your arguments against this. Onward to Cheez-Its. What is it with these things? One internet user suggests that the reason they are so addictive is because they get stuck to your teeth and you want to eat more to help get the stuck "stuff" off only to create more "stuff". Good theory but it doesn't apply to me as I crave this shit when I don't have it. While complaining about how one box doesn't last long enough, Allison watched me feverishly shove a handful into my mouth and said 'Maybe if you ate them slower.' I scoffed at her, 'Like that's possible.' Anyways there's probably no actual addictive properties it's just one of my stupid food phases, like with the tomato soup. That was a dangerous one. I burnt my tongue a lot, I spilled it on myself, it was in my dreams, it was everywhere. So for now I guess Cheez-Its and eggnog are what I'll obsess over. Oh! At the store there is Pumpkin and Gingerbread Eggnog. I have a bad feeling about this.

Doch wir küssen als ob nichts Geschieht

2009-11-06T23:18:00.001-07:00

I got sooo many jewel toned colored clothes. Mmm. There's this fun little shrug at h&m that I want to get, they have it in red and like a glittery gun metal. And there's that other gorgeous purple skirt and the cute jeans that they didn't have in my size. Today was exhausting. Got up at ten and went to the DMV and got shut down for a restricted permit because they didn't send me the information I needed on what I needed to do to get those privileges. Cause I'm a big girl I almost started crying so instead I made a fist and crumpled up the paper I had to fill out and lit a cigarette. Then we went shopping at h&m and oh my godddd it was so crowded, filled with old ugly leathery over tanned Scottsdale women. And the store is smaller than I'd like. And the underwear section is not nearly big enough. But its nice to have it. But they devote the entire upstairs to fucking kids clothes. I doubt that would've done that if they'd put it in Tempe. So then Allison and I were gonna ride bikes over the rummage sale but as soon as I got on I realized I couldn't even remember the last time I'd ridden a bike and the seat felt very high. Luckily Allison's tire was flattish so we didn't bike, and I didn't embarrass myself. I must learn how to ride a bike again. Anyways found lots of gems at the rummage sale, sadly none of the shoes were big enough for my ginormous feet. And well browsing this old lady was talking to me about she couldn't wear heels cause of her knee surgery and I love that I relate to old people because of this. We talked about how terrifying wearing heels is. Just give me my oatmeal and put me in a rest home already. I found some things for you Suzy! Don't get TOO excited I mean you might hate them for all I know, but when I saw them I was able to picture you wearing it/them. I'm gonna wait till I've accumulated more crap to send you to put together and send your care package. Maybe I'll be able to make something in PRISON. I wonder if I'm allowed a writing utensil so I document this amazing life experience I'm gonna have. Oh and speaking of, what if someone is giving prison tattoos? Should I get one? Jen and I were fantasizing awhile back about getting matching 'Tent City Represent' type tattoos. I don't want to work tomorrow. I'm so tired. I think I've written enough now to make you wonder why I wrote so much.

I have no life today.

2009-11-03T22:47:00.003-07:00

I basically spent all day in bed with my laptop. So once I finally got out of bed I decided not to make the pumpkie french toast but eggnog french toast instead. And for extra decadence I coated one in chocolate frosted flakes. Mmm. I painted my nails yellow, but because there's a bit of shimmer it's not as yellow as I'd like. The search will continue. I'm going to attempt a blueberry pie tomorrow.

Don't talk to the mayonnaise he's trouble?

2009-11-03T21:17:00.001-07:00

Fuck you holier than thou yoghurt. Thinking you're better than mayonnaise. Yes you can be tasty in the right situation but you will never replace mayonnaise. You are just jealous.

For those of you who can't tell I'm talking back to a tv commercial.

ATTENTION HUMANS, BEER TASTING IN THE BACK.

2009-11-03T13:19:00.003-07:00

So going back and reading over the old posts has made me realize I have an odd way of speaking sometimes. I'm so tired. I've been falling asleep every like half an hour for half an hour with my laptop on top of me making it all hot when I wake up. See like that sentence, isn't there any way I could've condensed that? Whatever I don't wanna think about it, I have to put all my brain into my writing assignment from Dad. I have to fax my lawyer a letter stating what I want in a plea agreement. Can't I just scribble something like 'yo dawg try 2 get me no jale tyme plz', I think he would respect that. How much are tattoos guns? I think I could make a good living as a traveling unlicensed back alley tattoo artist. My slogan could be 'For those who dare...' I would make a killing. And then I would start killing people by poisoning the ink. They would be called The Ink Blot murders, police state to state would be baffled because the way I'll leave my victims will actually fit the profile of a MAN. And I'm a WOMAN! dun dun duuuun. It won't end well for me, obviously, it never does.

ANYWAYS...
Time to write my mission statement.

One of these days I might just

2009-11-03T09:03:00.002-07:00

So, I've been reading over past blawwwwggssss, like I do when I'm feeling nostalgic, and I really need to start having these proofread. There's just lots of silly little things like leaving out words and switching around of letters and the like. And I know it shouldn't bug me this much but IT DOES. I'm actually tempted to through all of them and edit them, unless I wrote them while drunk, then they shall be saved for posterity. So I feel like crap. PURE CRAP. So I called into work, they understand. Anyways, enough of the crap, since I can't sleep since I feel so overwhelmingly awful I will tell you (Suzy since I'm pretty sure no one but you and me read this) about last night. So I work like 10 hours cause Jen's dad isn't doing well and she had to leave and no one else could come in so Dave, who opened, also had to close. This means nothing to anyone but me, but as a note to future me, you CAN work for ten hours straight, it is possible. Anyways so I got home, got dressed and Allison and I went off to Phoenix to go see the Evangelicals. I had only listened to them in Allison's car but my gosh, they were BUH.NA.NAS. They put on a really great show. Aaand yeah, then we hung out with them afterward and we got "fan bracelets" which are purple! Uggggh I write entirely too much, I need to scan some comics today. And pick out an outfit for court. Oh hey its only a one hour time difference now for Wisconsin and Chicago. I need some music, or a movie about heroin addicts. Those movies always make me feel better. Oh no! The internet has is failing. And it's back. I'm really just rambling on now. Maybe I'll paint something today. Does my blanket smell like sulfur? Maybe just a bit? I need my mangy quilt back. This post should have ended like ten hours ago.

Of slums, pirates and vampire children.

2009-10-23T12:35:00.002-07:00

So I fell asleep listening to the Christiane F soundtrack. And this what I dreamed. It was my 13th birthday (this is alternate world, I was really a Patera, I had a family but they weren't in the dream) and my friend was throwing me this party at this abandoned hotel where her and her friends stayed. It was this dimly lit, shabby, sad sack of a place. And there were no party decorations or cake or anything, just a bunch of opium that everyone was smoking. There were these two adults that were like a more sinister version of Patsy and Eddie from Absolutely Fabulous, and they were like den mothers to all the kids there. And there were a lot of kids, there was even one baby. So this dream basically followed my life from there, because I never after my birthday, I just stayed there for several years. No one could really leave this place even if they wanted to, but no one really wanted to because at this point most of us were addicted to the opium the den mothers provided us with. They never directly threatened us never to leave but there was an air of it. So one day I'm going through one of the more untouched rooms and discover a map of sorts, and it basically gives you instructions how to be transported to the ocean at any time. All you had to do was put some coins in your back pocket and with your hand in your pocket shake the change up and down one time. Having not smoked in a few hours, I was coming out of my opium haze and realized how bad it was there, and decided to take a chance with the ocean. So I did as instructed, and sure enough I was taken to the ocean. Just dropped right in the middle of some random body of water. I remember being angry that the instructions didn't specify where in relation to the ocean I would be taken but that soon didn't matter as a ship (A PIRATE SHIP) had spotted me and was coming to rescue me. So the captain of this ship was basically Jack Sparrow. So I spent much time on the boat blah blah blah about a month went by, Jack taught me a special way of swimming, and there was a pirate war. One time I was having a swim alongside the ship when someone yelled 'Look out!' and I looked out just in time to see another ship run me over, but it didn't kill me. Instead I was transported back home outside a supermarket and someone right near me lost their leg. So I went back to the hotel to try to collect some of my friends. So apparently things were a lot worse when I got back to the hotel. Everyone was scattered and hiding. I found my friend and asked her what happened, and she said about 12 hours ago they heard screams and strange noises coming from a couple stories up. So, because this is apparently a horror movie now, we went upstairs to investigate. There was blood on the walls and ceiling in the hallway and it was all leading to this room at the end of the hall. And I can't really remember what was there because in my dream it was actually really disturbing and scary, but basically there was a bloated dead baby that had been feeding on a live rabbit and some sort of vampire child that had tried to feed on something or someone but instead got her throat torn out. That's all.

Oh my TVC15

2009-10-20T00:39:00.003-07:00

Sooo the store manager of BevMo apparently just walked out this morning. I wonder what they're gonna do about replacing him. This doesn't make me any more excited, cause I'm not at all, to go back to work but at least it'll make for good gossip for a bit. So I guess it's safe to say I won't become an alcoholic because I came to a realization this weekend that I really only drink when I'm happy or in some sort of good mood. While it cannot be denied that I had fun with some of my favorite people this weekend, I can't say I was happy. We got in Thursday and I felt sick after we landed, didn't get more than an hour of sleep that night. And so the tone for the weekend was set, for me at least. I've been feeling so scatterbrained lately, I know I already complain a lot but I really feel like I've just been straight up having memory issues. It's probably nothing but it is weird. Liz and Kit had to turn around after we got out on the road cause I'd forgotten my boots at the apartment. Then I thought maybe I was just being crazy and had packed them after all and worried about this until I could check my suitcase, right before I did I got a text from Allison asking if I was sure I'd forgotten them. So for a moment I was sure I'd sent them back for nothing. I don't know why, even though they were back at the apartment, this made me feel so shitty. I'd also forgotten my make up bag back home in Arizona. It was the best to see Suzy again. Odin was as always a joy to be around and made me feel the closest thing to happiness. I fully planned on getting drunk that night, I had a fun outfit and I didn't feel completely drained despite the lack of nocturnal shut-eye, but we get there and I down a vodka Red Bull and...bleh. It's loud and there's all these people and so I have a beer, hoping this will be the key to happiness. But it just feels so tasking to drink when you're not feeling like you're having the time of your life. That's when I do my best drinking. So I went home early because all of this was just depressing me more. Odin was kind enough to keep me company on the bed, even if he did get poo on it. I can't even piece together the weekend beyond that. It was just a blur of trying to enjoy myself because I was with a group of people that I don't get to see nearly enough and trying to feel like drinking so I didn't feel like I wasted my time at one of the best drinking festivals ever. Just didn't happen for me though. Things I almost left behind at the cabin: Laptop.
Things I did leave behind at the cabin: romance novel from library, my paycheck, probably something else.

And now I'm back here, Suzy-less and more pressingly dog-less. I'm trying to figure out where I want to go from here, what I want to make of my life, and the only thing I can figure out for sure right now is that I need a dog. Not want, need. Well this was a big blawwwwg, and how boring for you all, no pictures. Hm, well, here.

In case you can't tell, that is a dog in the shape of a Southern Comfort bottle. You're welcome.

So this happened...

2009-10-09T22:33:00.003-07:00

This is monkey bread not five minutes out of the pan. Dad, Allison and I were successful at demolishing it as soon as our tongues could bare it. I think I still burned my tongue a little bit, but it's so worth it. Make this. It's simple.

It's FALL!

2009-09-30T20:51:00.003-07:00

Vanilla cupcakes with pumpkin buttercream!!!!!!!

hah you can see where my thumb smudged some frosting.

Millions of Peaches

2009-09-15T18:55:00.002-07:00

So I made this cake and I haven't tasted it yet but it looks tasty. Thank you dad for going to the store to get more butter and orange for me to zest.

So tonight I'm gonna party like it's 1999

2009-09-11T01:50:00.003-07:00

I'm terrible at hanging things but here are the paintings I did today. Oh and you can sort of tell the color I picked for my room.

Muffin Buffalo.

2009-09-10T14:23:00.002-07:00

So I made delicious muffins last night. Blueberry muffins with a cinnamon crumb topping to be exactly. They were big, hard to get out of the pan, and addictive. And they're all gone. And I didn't take a picture before they were all gone. Sorry. I'll just have to make something tasty again today and document that better than I did the muffins. Allison scanned several of my bevmo comics so I'll get those up soon. Ugh, muffin induced coma.

Holy crap.

2009-08-26T11:54:00.004-07:00

So mom bought a peach at the store yesterday, and after I got back from court this morning and getting some wonderful new jeans (NEW JEEEANS??? allison knows), I sliced open the peach and it smelled soooooo good and tasted delicious. And then I decided to cook it in some butter and put it between two pieces of vanilla almond french toast with a bit of cream cheese smeared on. It didn't require any syrup cause it was so decadent, but for scientific purposes I put a bit of boysenberry? syrup on. Mmmmmmmmmmmm! Sorry Allison, I realized I really do make the tastiest stuff while you're not here.

Ample Apple Beauties

2009-08-07T17:56:00.002-07:00

Oh yes, I haven't tasted them yet but they look and smell delicious. I'm gonna treat myself to some Chinese food, watch Craig Ferguson and devour these little lovelies.

Oh hell yes!

2009-08-05T14:57:00.000-07:00

Suck it, Gwyneth!

This made my black heart cackle with joy. It is truly great, truly.

Heavens to Betsy

2009-08-04T18:17:00.002-07:00

I found a tasty cheapish greasy delicious Chinese restaurant nearby. Soooooo good. Of course it's not hard to impress me as long as the food is fried and saucy. So yeah, thank you Chop and Wok for being so close and so fried. I still prefer Qwik Wok in Tempe because they have the best sesame beef I've found here, and you do not, but you do have delicious chicken wings and other delicious appetizers and I could eat a meal of appetizers. It's lonely here, I've just downloaded 'Transformers' and 'Ghosts of Girlfriends Past' so it looks like I'm watching crap tonight. In addition to watching at least one episode of 'Wife Swap' every day, and it's Shark Week. But Shark Week is actually quality programming...I don't really have a point here, those sentences never went anywhere. Here's a point, I'm watching NYC Prep, so aside from True Blood, Mad Men, and Deadwood to fall asleep to, Craig Ferguson to watch while I do dishes, and it being Shark Week, all I watch is crap. Pure crap. Ugh that girl is so fuck ugly. Can't even shorten it to fugly because that would a disservice to her wonky ass eyes. What else was I think of earlier that I wanted to tell someone but NO ONE ANSWERS THEIR PHONES..oh. Speak of the devil, Big Sooze is calling me back.

It's so funny

2009-07-30T00:36:00.002-07:00

I wish I could post the poem I thought of in my dream last night cause it's funny, but it's kinda dirty and I don't want anyone on the internet to steal it and claim it was their work. Cause it all came from me. 'The Game' is on tv, so of course I'm watching it. I killed a cockroach tonight. The most disgusting stick in the house (Pateras know which stick I speak of) is even more disgusting cause I killed that fucker with it. It's behind your piano mom. I'm going up to Flag tomorrow to see Lisa and retrieve a gift from Suzy, so damn excited. It'll be good to get out of this hot dry mess. Yawn, I wonder if I can fall asleep yet. I need to go to the SS place tomorrow to grab a new SS card. And by SS I of course mean Hitler's secret police. Someone please buy me The Sims 3. Please. PLEASE! Ok hopefully I can fall asleep. Maybe I'll come up with another brilliant poem.

Not a lazy bitch.

2009-07-25T22:14:00.002-07:00

So the bird that's been hanging out on the porch that I thought was just lazy and wanted to get away from the heat, does in fact what appear to be children! Bird children. There were I think two little ones behind her when I got home from work today and went I scooted closer to get a better look she didn't fly off like she usually does, probably cause she thought I was gonna eat her kids, and she is right to think that.

Oh so I had this dream I spilled the last can of tomato soup on myself and was very upset about it. So I looked up what it means. The soup part means I'm emotionally hungry, the tomato part foretells good health, but the spilling of food in a dream says that you should give up that food in "real life". FUCK THAT!

BURGER!

2009-07-14T20:20:00.003-07:00

So maybe I didn't hand form the beefy goodness, but I did cook it myself, cook the awesome bacon (cooked in the oven WITH BROWN SUGAR ON TOP) to go on the beef, HAND SLICEd the cheese! and buttered and grilled the buns myself. Ohhhh it's good.

Hmm

2009-07-13T17:29:00.002-07:00

Ok so I'm baking this tiny sheet cake (recipe) and the blogger either forgot to put how much baking powder to put in or accidentally typed in writing how to prepare it all. So to be safe I added a little bit. So I mean I don't think it'll turn out terrible cause the batter tastes great. Mmmmm 20 minutes or so till delicious cake.

There's always room for RAINBOW JELLO!

2009-07-13T15:56:00.002-07:00

Mmmm.

So since this was my first time making it, it doesn't look perfect, but hey first times are supposed to be awkward and messy, but it tastes gooood.

Getting over my fears

2009-07-05T21:34:00.003-07:00

I need to get over how much I hate flour touching my hands. So I made biscuits the other night, and made bacon egg and cheese sandwiches out of them mmmm. Didn't do anything for the 4th except watch 'Confessions of a Shopaholic', very cute movie. Anyways here's some stuff I made, apple popovers which were awesome but the recipe only makes four. And better pictures of the rainbow cupcakes. K so I didn't take pictures of the actual popovers, they got eaten too quickly, but I did take a picture of the apples cooking.

Flagstaff birthday amazingness bivens!

2009-07-02T23:39:00.005-07:00

I hiked down an entire mountain basically, in non grippy flat shoes that sparkle! and I didn't die or even break anything, and I was actually able to climb back up that mountain. Oh and it was Lisa's birthday. But I think my incredible feat is more amazing.

blahhh

2009-06-26T14:45:00.000-07:00

here I am at the cabin, my arm hurts!

Perez Hilton is STOOPID

2009-05-21T17:37:00.001-07:00

dumbass.

Attention Suzy

2009-05-11T00:37:00.002-07:00

Master of making a room look cute, I need to feel comfy in this room (picture below) that I will have to move into in about two weeks, I hate this room, but because I'm a 23(almost 24) year old loser who has to live with her parents temporarily (and really when is it gonna end, when bevmo gives me a raise? cause they ain't giving raises this year) and wants to feel comfortable in the place she'll be spending most of her time. Any TIPS? (like what the fuck should I do about that awful wall color? please note the color is about ten times more bright, bold, and garish in person)

hahahaha remember this??

2009-05-09T01:11:00.000-07:00

Cherry cake and cherry coke float cupcakes!

2009-05-06T21:15:00.001-07:00

Yum.

Enough with the awful commercials

2009-05-01T00:12:00.003-07:00

Van Lines (I think?) moving company, I didn't see the whole thing but it doesn't matter since I saw the dumbest part. Some ten year old hanging out the car window (moving to a new place I assume) and you hear his inner dialogue 'I wonder what cheerleaders wear in Florida...', a slight variation on what they wear in every other state you jackass.

Tastiest Gang Ever.

2009-05-01T00:03:00.004-07:00

The Hidden Valley Kings of Charlotte, North Carolina. Don't fuck with them or they will dip you in ranch and eat you like youse a carrot or some shit. I <3 'Gangland'.

(Wasn't there a tougher sounding street name or neighborhood they could've named themselves after?)

Update: Ok maybe that was the toughest sounding street name they could find considering that the other street sign in the shot with the Hidden Valley Rd sign is Cinderella Rd. Hehehehe.

What the...

2009-04-30T22:41:00.002-07:00

This AT&T commercial was just on and before it ended it tagged on at the end 'Buy Mom Samsung Propel after mail in rebate and get a free Samsung Propel after mail in rebate', wait what? Only one 'after mail in rebate' is necessary, right? Or have I gone stupid?

Fuck you 'I can't believe it's not butter'

2009-04-29T23:38:00.001-07:00

Cause I CAN believe you aren't butter, butter is wonderful, you are not. Fuck you and your holier than thou (or BUTTER IN THIS CASE) attitude. I'm done with you and we never even started, never contact me again, and I especially never want to see you on my tv again.

Let's get married and have kids at 16!!! Our looove is so strong it will be easy

2009-04-28T21:02:00.002-07:00

Fucking 90210. I mean I'm all about terrible plot lines but COME ON! Oh really you guys love each other so much you just know you'll feel the same way about each other forever even with the stress of trying to raise a child, finishing high school, and growing up. Really? I hope this crashes and burns so some dumb Adrianna-obsessed 90210 doesn't get any ideas and try to make art become life. Although I'm sure some version of this happens all the time, it's just so frustrating to watch it acted out (badly) on a teen drama. Watching Gossip Girl right before this was a bad idea because it highlights just how terrible this show is. Will I stop watching? Hell to the no. I need to get out more. Are there friends out there that want to be burdened with my presence? No? Ok, well I'll just make some tomato soup and watch The Hills.

Two bloody stumps!

2009-04-27T00:41:00.002-07:00

Or actually just one. I was walking outside the mall today and I noticed this guy walking in front of me had this awesome shirt on with owls embroidered on the back, and also his left hand was wrapped in a wet bloody rag with blood dripping from it. When in front of Starbucks he asked some guy if he would go into Starbucks for him to get him a plastic bag and the guy said, 'Sorry dude I'm busy' (he was strolling leisurely) and so bloody hand man said 'FUCK YOU!' and I didn't hear the rest cause I was heading inside, I considered going back to go in and get him a plastic bag, but I don't think Starbucks has plastic bags and then I realized that none of the stores close by would. I hope he found one.

Wildlife

2009-04-23T00:23:00.002-07:00

Every time I go out to my car it seems like a thousand different animals scuttle from the area, my car is currently covered tree sap and bird shit, I am warned by Mom about a 'huge lizard' roaming in the area, a damn cricket somehow jumped in my car while I was going 45mph and scared the shit out of me, and just now I heard the familiar howl of a coyote, only it sounded like it was in our backyard. And it's already getting hot as hell.

PANCAKE!!!!!!!

2009-04-19T15:35:00.004-07:00

So this morning I woke up and thought a oven baked apple pancake sounded really good. I couldn't remember the recipe I'd used before and I found what looked like it and varied it a little bit. Instead of pour the batter over the apples and putting it in the oven right away, first I sprinkled the brown sugar and cinnamon on the melted butter as per usual put the sliced apples on top BUT THEN sprinkled a little more brown sugar and cinnamon on top of the apples and threw some more butter on top of the apples and put it in the oven for about ten minutes. Then I put the batter on top and cooked it for almost thirty minutes and oh it was soooooo good. I also added some vanilla and Patera secret ingredient to the batter, delicious.

Well

2009-04-19T15:16:00.003-07:00

I'll post these on facebook as well but whatevs here's some pictures from Chicago, they include (in no particular order) Suzy at bingo night, Odin, Suzy with Odin, me with Suzy, and awesome graffiti.

America's Shrew

2009-04-17T00:00:00.000-07:00

Julia Roberts is the homeliest lookin' rodent I've ever seen.

This is what they should do with grapes

2009-04-15T02:43:00.002-07:00

I woke up about twenty minutes ago and it was 2:20am, I guess I fell asleep around midnightish, anyhoo I was very hungry and was so happy I picked up some grapes from Fresh and Easy earlier. I wish though there was some way they could make the skins of grapes more delicious to eat. That would be something.

Those are all my thoughts at this hour.

Blerg.

2009-04-09T15:34:00.002-07:00

Vacation hangovers are real. I'm considering changing a few things and I'm not sure if it's just from the vacation frenzy or if it's something I should've done long ago to make myself happier in day to day life. Bleh. Apparently there's now a Dr. Pepper Cherry, that's interesting.

Oh Odin

2009-04-05T15:17:00.002-07:00

Well Odin is huge, I mean reeeeeal big. Also he is very very cute and very crazy. I got in yesterday and went to Suzy's for the night, we got delicious chinese food and watched True Blood, and I fell asleep very early in the night and tried to stay awake. Woke up around 9 and then Liz called and we decided to go to breakfast. First Suzy and I took Reggie, the adorable part labrador that resides in that residence, for a walk around the block. Liz and Kit pulled up at the end of the walk and got to meet Reggie. Reggie is very cute and very loving and just needs a bit of training and discipline. We went to Ann Sather's and got cinnamon rolls and eggs and potatoes and it was all so very tasty. Then we came and I finally got to see Odin and he is so damn big it surprised me. We took him for a walk in the bitter windy cold and he's very good on walks. So then we figured out dinner, spaghetti and meatballs, strawberry shortcake dessert and they went to the store. So I took a shower, finally, and during the shower Odin got into a pantry and let loose a bag of popcorn kernels and threw around some sprouting potatoes. Silly dog. Anyhoo now I'm just watching Kit play GTA on their humongous tv.

Listen to Ozzy Osbourne

2009-04-01T14:41:00.004-07:00

Sooo today was Allison's birthday and we got up early and went to her class, there was a grammar class and I got to participate and apparently I have the passe compose and imparfait still tucked away in my brain somewhere, so yay. And then we went to a restaurant called Breakfast in America and got some delicious burgers and after that we got delicious pastries for Allison's birthday. I think the lady at the shop got annoyed with how much we were getting. After that we went to her Art History class and I was asleep within five minutes but stayed awake for the second half because it was really interesting and funny. Then we went a got a beer and waited for Allison's friends and then went to an absinthe bar and had some absinthe, the bar was hilarious, see the pictures for what I mean by hilarious. And now we're home. Yawn, I get to sleep in tomorrow.

So here we are, we're all here

2009-03-29T15:18:00.003-07:00

Well it's my last night in Eeeeeengland, and I'm having some beer and have showered and am packed (thank you Jon). We went to Fabric on friday night and it was indeed crazy. The place is huge, I was scared to go anywhere by myself because I wouldn't gotten lost even if I wasn't drunk. It was me, Jon, Chris, their friend...whose name I cannot recall, Jon's sister Caroline and her friend Alex. Caroline and Alex were both really fun and it was nice to have some female company after almost two weeks being one of the guys. Ugh, my nose is running. Anyways we got out of there at like 5 in the morning and took a cab back to Chris' and it took forever. Once we were there for some reason Jon and I started fighting and he punched in on my thigh! So hard! So I bit him. Yes mom, I'm a wild animal and I should be put in a cage, just like you always said. I think he fared better though because I have a vicious bruise and he just has two little rows of teeth mark. Then we woke up and took forever to get out of there and get something to eat because Chris is a big girl who takes forever to get going. We stopped in at fish and chips place and I got a burger and Jon got sausages, one of which I had a couple bites and it was so gooooood. mmm. And uh yeah, that's all the story of Stalingrad. And today we went to Tesco's, which I'm going to miss dearly, and got some foooood and went back later to get some beeeeer. And watched the qualifying shit for motorcycle racing. Good day. Now I need to concentrate on drinking this beer.

Oh and there was this disgusting old salad in a bag from over a week ago. Oh and I lost my hearing for a bit today, I think it's pretty much back now.

I am a poet

2009-03-27T11:57:00.000-07:00

if it's dirty and wrong,
it turns someone on

Take me back to Metra!

2009-03-25T10:32:00.003-07:00

Soooo Monday night we went down to London town and ate zebras, kangaroos, ducks, crocodiles, squids, fishes, and bugs. I only ate 4 of those listed. It was all very tasty, I especially liked my duck and the kangaroo. We then went to find a drink and were outside drinking when this drunk girl walked out and talked about who knows what for however long, and she gave me a hug or something like it. Then in our haste to drink more and not be outside in the freezing cold we went into a club that none of us really wanted to go into. Highlights included plastic bottles of beer, vodka and tonic with no vodka, drunk girls living out their stripper fantasies, and me hiccuping beer onto the table only to have Jon and Chris think that I had vomited right there, good times! It was sooooooo cold out and we had to wait foooorever for a cab after we got off the train and ugh it was just so cold. I barely slept a wink that night and thus got really good sleep last night. Anyhoo here's some pictures.

I am indeed out of the country

2009-03-22T10:42:00.003-07:00

Since I haven't provided photographic evidence of leaving the country some people took this to mean I was just hiding out in Mesa. Sorry I've just been too tired/busy to blog. And same goes for taking pictures, I meant to and then forgot. Sorry I'll try to take more. Here's what I have, from Czech Republic.

Socks and Transformers

2009-03-17T11:52:00.003-07:00

Are the things I forgot to bring, but it's all good because Jon has both. So now I'm a couple beers in and hanging out in Jon's room drinking a beer that was made from champagne yeast in alsace. It's chilly here! But I'm having fun so far so yay, and I'll try to take pictures.

Ugh

2009-03-16T00:49:00.002-07:00

I'm sitting here watching the end of Hitch having missed the first hour of the movie and I'm crying, what is wrong with me. But I hate Will Smith's romance storyline, fuck that bitch, oh and now she's all aloof after she practically begged him to give her a second chance after she was a complete cunt to him? FUCK THAT. Someday I'm going to do remakes of all the movies that I think need a different ending. I really hope I remember to bring everything. I have my clothes, deodorant, new underwear and I've shampooed and conditioned my make up brushes. Ugh I need to put music on my ancient brick of an mp3 player, and since this is my birthday present I can't ask for a new mp3 player for my birthday for the 3rd year running. Oh well, Christmas is coming. THIS MOVIE IS TERRIBLE.

Good News!

2009-03-15T16:02:00.002-07:00

I found my camera! It was in a plastic bag I'd emptied heavy things in my purse that was making it heavy into. Bad news, the memory card appeared to be chipped and therefore my computer refuses to recognize it. Hmm. Oh well I found my camera! Yay! I'm packing up stuff and am just waiting for laundry to dry to put the rest in and then figure out how I'm going to safely snuggle four bottles of beer in between the clothes and be able to fit all the food Allison wants with my shoes and toilet trees. I need to paint my nails!

Dying is deadly

2009-03-14T23:37:00.002-07:00

There's a tv in Allison's room right now which makes even more comfy to hang out in bed. I leave in less than 48 hours and I have to do laundry, pack, go back and clean the porch, do mp3 player stuff and hope that I'll have enough to keep me occupied for the durations of my flights. I hope they still show movies on planes. Anyhoo.

Attention everyone

2009-03-03T15:57:00.003-07:00

Allison is very lazy. I would post some comics, but they're not scanned. But circumstances prevent this from being done at this time. Sorry, blame tourists.

I LEAVE IN TWO WEEKS, LESS THAN. I need to start packing up my place and cleaning. I'm trying to think of things I need to bring if you have any suggestions please say something. Anyways I can't spell or type today so goodbye.

ugh

2009-02-22T21:27:00.002-07:00

I love musicals and all, but this is some bullshit. Why are they doing this? And Beyonce? Really? This is why musicals get a bad rap. Beeeehhhhhhh.

Roarrrrin flames

2009-02-16T00:33:00.005-07:00

Well I was gonna post a sexy video of the awesome fire I made, but for some reason video uploading ain't working right now.

Anyways here's five pictures of the fire...

Gross

2009-02-11T19:16:00.001-07:00

She's just so ugly and evil!

Family Sins

2009-02-11T18:22:00.001-07:00

Everyone keeps calling her 'Mama', including her husband. This movie is ridiculous.

Family Sins

2009-02-11T18:10:00.001-07:00

Kirstie Alley is a beast.

And so is her assistant in this movie.

God, they're beastly.

Sike ick?

2009-02-01T21:59:00.003-07:00

So I had a dream a couple nights ago that I was browsing the internet and read a story...FROM THE FUTURE! that the Cardinals won the Pooper Bowl (cause it's all people talk about while I'm at work), and wondered if my dreams can predict the future. Well I guess they can't. This time. But a couple years ago I had a dream where I was in some weird place and this person that reminded me of a hipster Frankenstein sort of danced up and said in a silly low voice (that I will recreate in person if you ask) 'This looks like the land of the lost'. And now there is movie of 'The Land of the Lost' being released soon, coincidence? I doooon't thiiiink sooo! So if you have any questions about your future, just put in a request and I'll think about it all day so that it might end up in my dreams that night. Ack. Scare! I accidentally hit the touchpad and the pointer was at the Tastespotting button and I thought I'd lost the post. I think I might dye my hair tomorrow. Suggestions? New color? Stay the same? Lighter? Darker? Stay blonde? Go crazy? Give me your mind nuggets, people.

Democracy!

2009-01-26T14:45:00.003-07:00

Do it!

If you don't sign this you're a communist.

Speaking of Communists I've long suspected that my older sister and her husband share the Commie love. But I could be wrong, signatures on a petition speak for themselves.

You're lying, EVERYONE has rain gutters!

2009-01-22T14:26:00.002-07:00

Soooooo I got my tickets for the March/April travel extravaganza. March 16th I leave for London and hang around there for like two weeks and then March 30th I fly to Paris to go get drunk with Allison and then April 4th I fly to Chicago to try to catch up with anyone and everyone in four days, should be fun! I leave Chicago on the 8th and then poof I'm back here and have to go back to work and the fun is ovah. Well I must go to the doctor but I'll get those comics up soon I promise, sort of.

feeeeeeeeeeeeeesh

2009-01-20T19:48:00.002-07:00

So. I dunno. I felt like blogging. I think our president is pretty cool so far, I like his speech thing going on right now talking to the people in Afghanistan. I will have some new comics up soon. Especially since I just cleaned my car and found this one I'd forgotten about. Andrew and I just had some Pete's Fish and Chips for his birthday dinner. But I think he may need a cake.

You been spittin....

2009-01-01T21:02:00.006-07:00

Happy New Year's people, I wish I had my best friends Lisa and Suzy and Jon with me but Andrew and Allison and our friends sufficed. I have tomorrow off so yay I can sleep in again. I have some new comics to put up I just need to scan. It's cold in this house. Anygay I'm trying to plan two trips and am starting to realize one might not happen and I hate that. I don't know, maybe it's time to start racking up credit card debt again. KISSES!

Merry Xmas ya'll

2008-12-24T20:41:00.002-07:00

I am tired. Today was by far the craziest day at BevMo! We made $73,000 which is a lot especially since we had shorter hours. But now I'm home and just had an amazing dinner of filet mignon with mushrooms and good sauce and potatoes au gratin. And chocolate souffle with creme anglaise is coming. The Yule Log is on the tv with radio plays playing instead of christmas music. Kinda weird. I could fall asleep now, but I won't. I'm just so tired and need to draw some comics at some point before I forget the subject matter. Anyhoo Suzy hope your christmas is wonderful, I miss you and can't wait to seeeeeeeee you. I'm gonna lie down.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH///HAHAHA??

2008-12-20T23:33:00.000-07:00

PLEEEEEASE PLEEEEEEEASE WATCH THIS

Hey Suzy

2008-12-15T21:51:00.000-07:00

When are you going to France? UNDERPANTS.

Head Wrestlin'

2008-12-10T16:11:00.001-07:00

I am the undefeated champion of HEAD WRESTLIN', thought you all would like to know.

COMICS!

2008-12-09T18:53:00.002-07:00

THIS FIRST ONE IS VERY ANGRY CAUSE I WAS VERY ANGRY TODAY.

And these next few are ones I meant to put up awhile ago but never got round to.

Page three Illustration

2008-12-02T23:13:00.002-07:00

More of the story to come....son.

Part 2

2008-11-19T21:23:00.000-07:00

He crept slowly toward the ICEE haven and wondered if he should wait for the family to leave or just go for it.

He woke up in a daze, feeling like he was looking through red tinted glasses he glanced around the cave. Bewilderment took him over. What happened? He saw numerous large ICEE cups strewn about along with several pairs of children’s socks. Those socks, it was all coming back to him now. He had decided to enter the 7-Eleven with an overbearing sweetness. He walked on his toes as if he was avoiding stepping on snails. Making his way towards the ICEE machine he pretended to have a hat and took it off and bowed towards the sales clerk. Tip-toeing towards bliss he noticed children stood in his way. They had already filled their cups but were drinking them quickly and kept going back for more. “If the apocalypse came today would you be ready?” the bear asked the children. At this, they stared at him, sticky sweetness dripping from their faces. “Would you?” asked the oldest. The bear hadn’t expected this. Alarmed but trying to stay calm, he said, “Well I would if only I had some shoes.” Looking down at the children’s feet, he said “Yours will do!” Then quicker than any bear he swiped their shoes and their ICEES and made his way out the way he came in, making sure to bow his head to the clerk as he left, to which the clerk just shook his head.

Part 1

2008-11-19T01:06:00.001-07:00

The bear hurried down the mountain hungering for more than hikers. He stopped at the pavement and sniffed the air. What he sought was nearby. He started scampering across the road, looking both ways to watch for oncoming traffic and head down the side of the road heading east. Coming around the bend his pace slowed as the 7-Eleven came into sight. His anticipation had him breathing hard and fast. “Calm yourself old bear or they’ll never let you in.” No one wants a wheezing bear in their stores, frightens potential customers away. He walked the rest of the way so he could catch his breath and maybe sneak in undetected. When he was but 20 feet from his destination, an RV pulled into the parking and four kids popped out with their parents. “WE WANT ICEES! WE WANT ICEES!” the children were chanting. Hearing this sent the bear into a state of panic, he wanted ICEES as well. What if there weren’t enough? A bear can consume a lot, but kids can be downright greedy, he didn’t want to have to attack the children for theirs. Though, he was of course prepared to do so, if that’s what it came to. This wasn’t his first time at the rodeo, or the 7-Eleven in this case.

Fright Night at BevMo!

2008-11-16T20:16:00.003-07:00

So there's been stories of spooky happenings at BevMo. So the store is haunted. Tonight Jen and I were the only ones in the store, and this store is huge. We were walking to the front from the break room after clocking out and we heard a bang in the middle of the store and there was nothing there! DUN DUN DUN! And we both looked at each other and said 'Did you hear that?'. Confirmed that we both heard it, and we walked hurriedly next to the each other the entire time to set the alarm. When we got to the manager booth we heard another noise farther back and decided to get out of there. We caught our breath outside and hoped that it wasn't just a lost customer in the very back that neither of us had seen during the hour that'd we'd been closing. But since we both went to the back several times and the doors were locked it's not likely. SPOOKY!

Never Gonna Give You Up

2008-11-09T20:52:00.002-07:00

There's something weird and slightly hard in my hair. Ugh price tag. I did so much work today it's ridiculous. I'm tired, sick, and hungry but not. And unwashed. Must shower before 8 am tomorrow because corporate bigwigs are coming when the store opens at 9 and uggggggghhhhhhh I need to look good..ish. My tire is losing air and I need it filled. Might have to wash these dirty pants. And get enough sleep unlike last night. It's all so overwhelming I felt like crying all day at work. And wanting to cry and wanting to murder an incompetent coworker at the same time is a very odd feeling. Well I'm gonna publish this and come out. I'll post some new comics either tonight or tomorrow whenever I feel like not dying.

So here it is...

2008-10-19T21:02:00.003-07:00

...the special post. So no more calling me asshole, asshole. So this is what I spend some days doing at work. These are all customer inspired drawerings I've done and put up for everyone to enjoy. I'll try to do more, just gotta wait for the inspiration in the form of ridiculous customers. Let me know what ya'll think of mah pikchers. Oh yeah and here's some pictures from a play day at the park.

Actually we heard you were coming and put that there cause we hate you.

2008-10-19T20:52:00.003-07:00

(that would be a knocked over display of wine, liquor, whatever customers walk into)

'That's dangerous to have that there, whoever put that there should've known that I would be walking there and put it in the space next to it. It's not my fault, my legs knocked it over, not me! You should tell your manager how dangerous it is to have something where I plan on walking.

Oh and do you have this great, I think it was wine, that I had in this hilltop cafe in some country I can't remember the name of?'

Uggggggggh.

Yeah, but I'm just hanging out at this register for my health.

2008-10-19T20:48:00.002-07:00

'Are you open down here?'

Obviously exagerrated for humor, but seriously, happens all day long.

Because you'll just come and eat it all.

2008-10-19T20:45:00.002-07:00

That's really what she looked liked.

For those of you who can't read my handwriting...

'Where's the Baaaaaahja Baaaahbs Margarita miiiix? Well if it's so paaahhhhhpular why don't you get mooooore?'

...well, where they at?

2008-10-19T20:40:00.003-07:00

A family called the shopping carts, wagons, I struggled to contain my laughter.

What's happenin?

2008-10-12T20:50:00.002-07:00

That's what I realized I should have named the previous post. And Suzy for your information it's not that I don't like his movies, for the most part I do enjoy them very much, but seriously? Have you seen this one? And also I think the man himself is kind of a tool, but I could watch 'Signs' for days. Anyways, I hated today, it was officially idiot day when and ugggh there were so many. But onward, I'm watching a show about...nature. Penguins were being eaten but they also showed one getting away so that's good. There was some meatloaf and biscuits waiting for me when I got off so I ate that. Now there are scary noises! I watched 'Me Without You' last night and everyone is so pretty in it. I wanna go to the fair soon. Anyhoo. I don't have any clothes for cold weather, which is now is. So I'm gonna go try to still enjoy the cool weather without getting sad over the fact that I have nothing to wear and nothing to buy some new clothes with.

Day for Night....

2008-10-11T21:15:00.003-07:00

Ugh.

So I actually enjoyed 'Signs' and 'The Sixth Sense', 'Unbreakable' was...I dunno good to watch when it's on tv, and 'The Village' is beyond great. I haven't seen *whisper* 'Laaaady in the Waaaaterrr' yet but it'll be the next movie I rent just to see if it was as ehhhhhh as 'The Happenin'. No real twist! That's my complaint! The twist is revealed in the middle of the movie of basically and they just confirm it at the end. I do walk away with two wonderful things, making scary wind sounds and...'You eyein' my lemon drink??', which I'm gonna try to work into every conversation. Oh he's so annoying. M. Night Shyamalan you can go suck a fuck.

Question...

2008-09-24T20:33:00.001-07:00

Why is Perez Hilton trying to look like Pete Wentz? He shouldn't be straight ironing his hair against his head it just accentuates how big and fat it is. Anyways....Gossip Girl time.

God's Farm

2008-09-19T22:58:00.002-07:00

Allison, Andrew and I played Mad Libs (or Wacky Web Tales) for about an hour on Wednesday, I laughed reeeal hard. I accidentally spoke with a southern twang several times at work today, it was odd. And uggggh my next day off is Tuesday. They're working this dog too hard, I'm not a circus bear. I'm so tired, still. I'm always tired these days. I never feel like I get enough sleep. Andrew and I watched Nim's Island last night, which was actually pretty cute. Gonna watch Breakfast on Pluto tonight and we've been watching the first season of Curb Your Enthusiasm. I'm just woof I dunno not very happy, and I dunno. Andrew almost died. I'm being melodramatic, he could have died if his bacterial ear infection ruptured ear drum bleeding in head thing didn't get treatment. I miss you Suzy, I think I'm gonna fall asleep soon. Which means I have to leave Allisons, which sucks. Anyhoo, I'll blog again soon.

HEAD UNDER-WATERRRRR

2008-09-14T21:01:00.003-07:00

Sorry, that's what the theatre bitch on 90210 was singing reallly loudly. Brownies I smell. I'M SO TIRED. I'm taking an antibiotic and they makes me tired. Like goofy muscle relaxer tired. I'm loving this new 90210, it could be a little more over the top but oh well. I also like the new show 'Priveledged' and of course Gossip Girl is great. Now I just need to remember when all my other shows starts so I can record them. Today at work someone made me feel bad for having a day off yesterday for apparently no reason, since it was crazy busy at work I shouldn't have requested the day I guess because you know work is my life and ugggggh. Whatevs, I'm over it. I'm just glad the work day is over and I get to eat some brownies soon and be tired and sleepy and sleep in tomorrow. Ugggggh I don't know what to say I feel like my life is so boring and unblogworthy now. I miss Suzy terrible, yes, you Suzy. Im not drinking this week because of the antibiotics, but it's good cause Andrew is not drinking with me. So because I am boring here's some pictures.

Apache

2008-08-10T21:39:00.002-07:00

We're watching 'Freaky Friday', and oh I just love this movie, it's just...yeah. We had ribs and mac'n'cheese, which was yummy. I wish I had my camera with my camera with me but I think we lost it at Allison's last night. Allison and her roommates were trying to finish off what was left of their old stock of liquor, so I had a couple shots and I dunno. Andrew got naked and jumped in the kiddie pool, like he does. Then we went home. Allison had her first hangover, she was very sick all day. Then we watched the 'lympics, I love the 'lympics. We watched the qualifying for women's gymnastics, and put better music on during the floor routines. It was good. Hehehe I love this movie. Andrew wishes we could watch it in slow motion so we could enjoy it longer. Anyhoooo. Byefornow. Oh, and we wanna start a commercials only channel.

Blawwwwwwwwwgggg

2008-07-08T16:21:00.001-07:00

No one blogs anymore! I hope this changes once everyone comes back home.

That's what she said!

2008-06-16T20:39:00.001-07:00

I don't feel like getting wet right now.

Stuff White People Like

2008-06-16T20:33:00.002-07:00

I have some bite marks on me from one of the cutest puppies that ever roamed the earth. This week is getting exciting, we went to the Coyote Roadhouse tonight for dinner which was delicious. We got a fried onion loaf and cheese curds, then I got ribs which were good and I still have some left over. Liz wrote her vows tonight, and vowed to dye my roots tonight but she has broken that one. Bad habit to start Liz, keep a watchful eye Kit. I'm currently rockin' a gangsta look according to Josh because of the hoodie he lent me. 4rdaew. Good contribution Allidoxd...

Allison.
c
Allison.
w
ugh...I'm ddund
sh88hetrg9io

blerg

2008-06-13T16:47:00.003-07:00

UGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH. NO MORE TASTESPOTTING. ARE YOU KIDDING ME. I AM SO ANGRY RIGHT NOW. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. UGGGGGHHHH WORST NEWS EVER. ARRRRRRRGGGHHHHHH.

In better news, BevMo called me and asked if I was still interested in working for them, I told them they could pay me in beer. And uhhh yeah I'll be heading to Chicago tomorrow. ODIN! I'm very weak feeling, hungry and slightly hungover. I'm very excited about this coming week though. Oh I'm so hungry, I wish I had some cheese curds, can we go out to dinner sunday so I can get some cheese curds? Puhweeeease? I feel like I'm dying from heatstroke. So I'm gonna eat something.

KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!
no more tastespotting is still very upsetting to me.

Jon, this one's for you

2008-05-26T15:21:00.003-07:00

I'm not necessarily dying without constant internet access. But it does keep me from keeping in contact with one of my favorite people on the planet, Jon, that's you. Everyone else I can call, or they can call me. Anyhoo, it's my fucking birthday. Or birfday. I'm watching 'Men in Black' chugging a beer sitting between Allison and Andrews, my two A's. I can smell my cake I can see my presents. And it's way too hot. I want a dog. I miss Zeke, especially today, it's just not a proper birthday without Zeke being Zeke. Stupid dog food commercials reminding me how much I miss him. Woof, I don't really care for this beer. I wish I had more to say, I wish I had pictures to post. But I don't. Anyways, I'll try to post more often.

Sleeping Bears and Dirty Dogs

2008-04-22T21:42:00.002-07:00

So still no internet or anything like that and I keep forgetting to bring...uh stuff that holds pictures to the house to put them on someone's computer so I can post them and all that. I'm a scatterbrain. I had a job interview tuhday. So fingers crossed. I'm getting a tan, sort of. And the apartment is starting to look better. Andrew remains wonderful. I saw Cory over the weekend so it was great to see her again. I wish I had more to report. It's hot here. Gas prices are SOARING. Allison made a delicious dutch cookie. Oh! Andrew and I watched 'Step Up' and I actually quite enjoyed it. And now 'Heartbreakers' is on. Later dude.

Hi! Whats up

2008-04-11T19:12:00.002-07:00

So I'm sorry I haven't bloggggggged in forever but I don't have the internet at my new place so I have to depend on the goodwill of my family members and their connection. Ummmmmmmm last weekend Andrew and I went to Payson to dogsit for his dad, it was...fun. Payson is clean. I read the paper. The newspaper. Andrew's friends are awesome and it's good fun hanging out with Andrew pretty much every damn day. He's sitting next to me right now looking lke his wonderful self. And the whole family, minus Liz and Kit, plus Jack, are here. Ribs, mac and cheese, and apple pie. Ummmm as soon as I get the internet I'll do a post with a huge shitload of pictures. Andrew drank all my Gatorade. Laura Tams and I have decided to be friends since she told all her other ones to fuck off, so yay, new friend. I wish they'd make a new Tomb Raider. The one for 360 was really fun and I was able to complete it in a couple days, pretty cool. Ok I'm done, I'll do something more interesting hopefully in a couple days.

I'm sick.

2008-04-01T19:25:00.001-07:00

That's all, pity me.

Andrew and Margaret blog together

2008-03-22T19:41:00.003-07:00

So, Andrew and I are typing with one hand each. The boy is failing, and I am winning at life.

Alternative version:

So, Andrew and I are typing with one hand each. The boy is awesome, and I am failing at life.

Review: Mayonnaise

2008-03-16T22:15:00.002-07:00

I love mayonnaise. I've heard about the mayonnaise lover's mayonnaise which is Asian, so I want to seek that out, but this stuff is good too. Mmm creamy.

The plan

2008-03-15T15:58:00.002-07:00

Should be fun.

2008-03-15T14:53:00.002-07:00

Well I'm sitting here watching 'Erin Brockovich' looking like I went out last night but I didn't, but I am tonight, there is a dance party. I'm also planning my route right now. And unless Lisa has HUGE objections, we are gonna stop in Tulsa the first night, I'm saying fuck the curse of Oklahoma bad shit happens if you let it happen. So we WILL drive through Oklahoma. From Tulsa we're gonna go to allll the way to Gallup or some shit near there. So that way Saturday we can stroll into Phoenix in the afternoon. The first two days might be kinda rough but it'll be extremely worth it. Oh which reminds me I need to start burning cd's. The trip would be hell without those, but not really because Lisa and I could just make up songs the entire way and dance our way through the states. But I really would prefer music. Ok well I'm gonna do that now, I've got my work cut out for me. I haven't even started putting music in the proper folders. I don't know if I'm even gonna bother with song order.